i walk away
it is he who smiles
it is i who is pleased
Copyright © 2018 Tamika Brown and TheFynePrynt.com
Pouring Out
Life is truly about ebbing and flowing; ups and downs; giving and taking. But if we are not careful, if we do not take good care of ourselves we can end up flailing about, constantly searching for our buoyancy. And of course, when we flail, we run the risk of grabbing for anything in search of salvation.
And it’s funny how it happens, we roll right along, doing the ten million things we do. Working, listening, giving, creating … constantly pouring out. All the while, not noticing our own meter. Not noticing that we are not being poured into.
Take parenting for instance. Although I haven’t done the official math on it, I believe that 100% of the time, parents will only receive about a 10% return on “parental investment”. Our children love us, but simply do not care about how much we do to, with and for them. We can bake five thousand cookies the night before a bake sale because a teacher sent a last-minute note in desperate need. We do it for the love of our children, for the support of teachers whom we also love. In return, we may/possibly/not likely receive a pre-typed thank you note in return.
Anyway, you get my meaning on that. I am not delusional enough to think that there is ever a point at which we receive in the same measure what we give. And although the numbers will differ, every aspect of our lives have a measure of input-output which should ultimately balance out.
Confession. I have a terrible problem of monitoring my meter. Whenever I commit to something, I really commit. I’m not a perfectionist but I do place a high expectation on myself to create the best thing or love honestly and without hesitation.
I also have a terrible problem of not demanding that which I pour. And because of this, I at times find myself at points of near-emptiness. All while simultaneously being filled with tears and longing. Filled with a desire to be poured into. Filled with a longing to be loved honestly and without hesitation.
It’s amazing just how much space absence can take up.
Thankfully though, I understand the importance of self-care, of saying no to other people and things. Of saying yes to myself. For now, this is enough to allow me the space to continue to grow stronger in voicing my needs with the full expectation of being poured into …
Copyright 2018 Tamika Brown and The Fyne Prynt
never. again.
you f*cked her over
filled her belly
with excuses
impregnated her
with lies
she gave birth
to resentment
to doubt
to anger
and a solemn promise
never again.
Copyright © 2017 Tamika Brown and TheFynePrynt.com
just.facts.
my Blackness
my womaness
my southerness
my heritage
my ability to love
my desire to be loved
my openness
my magic
my oneness
my duality
my spirit
my humanity
my willingness
my intellect
my comfort
i provide rest
you see me
i am fire
i am clarity
i am light
my brown skin
on its own offends
your privilege
your existence
the air i breathe
is the air you breathe
no amount of
wishing
hoping
praying
cursing
politicizing
conniving
shucking
jiving
bible-thumping
or lying
will change that
Copyright © 2017 Tamika Brown and TheFynePrynt.com
Culture Commentary: A Day Without Woman
#ADWAW is a point of privilege. I feel its necessary to go ahead and plop that out right up front.
While its intentions are good and wholesome and very kumbaya, it is a point of privilege nonetheless. The woman. The woman who already works more only to be paid less, who uses sick days and vacation days to care of all but themselves. The woman who works … with NO paid time off. The woman who cannot afford to take a day off but is now forced to do so because schools are closed.
I salute each woman who has the mind to participate in #ADWAW. But I remain puzzled about its benefits; its beneficiaries. What good does our absence do when, tomorrow, we will have to work even harder to make up for today?
Absence, like quitting, is easy. The real work of the movement is in presence. The real work is in inviting women into your space who do not look like you, who do not worship like you, who do not live like you do and certainly not where you do. It is our presence that builds, that grows, that lifts. We are beyond the point of ABSENCE.
Resistance cannot only be about what we’re “not gonna do”. Resistance is and always has been about breaking barriers. INSISTING that your child’s school celebrates women’s history; INSISTING that Black history is everyone’s history; INSISTING that a girl’s/woman’s body is her own to control; INSISTING absolutely and on every available platform that Black Lives Matter; INSISTING that your coworker not be unfairly treated simply because her skin has been forever kissed by the sun.
Now is the time to be PRESENT
Now is the time to STAND
Now is the time to SPEAK
Now is the time to FIGHT
Now is the time to ACT
It is wonderful to have a national platform to showcase “solidarity” but the truth, for many/most of you is that the real platform – the place where the real work needs to be done, is WITHIN.
Copyright © 2017 Tamika Brown and TheFynePrynt.com
restless
can’t find the words
don’t have the feeling
didn’t catch those feelings
listening intently
hearing nothing
constant noise
roaring mentally
grabbing me
shaking me
pay attention
or blink
and i’ll miss it
miss him
miss you
miss me
most of all
Copyright © 2017 Tamika Brown and TheFynePrynt.com
handle with care
Choosing to love
Having love choose you
Perfectly imperfect
Always moving
Always changing
Always growing
Evolving or devolving
Handle with care
Even if not by choice
Even if not given in the way we anticipate
If not received in ways that we hoped
If not shared
If not multiplied
Handle with care
The divinity of love is really unmatched
There is nothing quite like it
We all want to feel it
We all want to be bathed in it
We all want
it
But when it comes and it is not in the form that we so desire
That we’ve prayed for
That we’ve wished for
That we have determined is the ideal
Then what?
What happens to that love?
What happens when we stop handling it with care?
What happens when we stop appreciating it, take it for granted?
When we decide that it is not enough?
When we make those decisions and not focus on what love is
what it is meant to be
what its true divinity is
then
We tear down
We tear up
destroy
Hurt those around us
Especially those who love us
in word and deed
Handle with care
Love
It is not for possession, to be possessed to be given as a possession
it is merely to be
It is to teach
It is to behold
It is to celebrate
It is all these things
It is none of these things
It is everything
To anyone who has ever wanted it
To anyone who has ever thought they had it
Anyone who has truly achieved this divinity
It is hurtful
It is painful
It does not have to be
But
That is what we make it
Because we cannot
Decide
We want to get high
we want to stay high
And for anyone who has ever dabbled in things that get you high
You know, those things, don’t keep you there
The same is true with love
Handle with care
If you are unable to handle it with care
Then surely, you shouldn’t handle it at all.
Copyright © 2017 Tamika Brown and TheFynePrynt.com
Image: blamethedragon
never.the.less
she toiled
she labored
she was snatched from her home land
she was torn from her children,
and they, away from she
she was stolen from her own body,
dispossessed as nonchalantly as you please
she birthed
she buried
she grew angry
she grew weary
she fought
she {somehow} held fast
she prayed
she cried
she empowered, even those who only love her when it suits their best interests
she screamed
she sought vengeance
she listened
she learned
she grew
she took flight
she keeps pushing, even though they keep yelling, spitting, cursing her to stop
she forgives
she loves
she strives
she teaches
she brings forth
she hands down
she lifts up
she persisted.
nevertheless.
even before they ever thought that it was a righteous thing to do.
Copyright © 2017 Tamika Brown and TheFynePrynt.com
Image: tijienenetalks
… gone
what is it with this thing
this thing between you and me
this thing that keeps growing
keeps changing
devolving
deescalating
driving rivers and driving wedges
firmly between our shores
caught within the clasp
of a million minutes past
bringing it up
sinking us down
leaving not even enough room for light
much less love
rushing ever swifter towards a calling that cannot be denied
but a calling that leaves me
not by your side.
Copyright © 2017 Tamika Brown and TheFynePrynt.com
#BlackHistoryNow
we are greater than the narratives others try to write for us.
we are the culture the vultures are always after
we are the pride, the presence, the humanity of a nation that has, at every turn, tried to dehumanize and silence us
we are beautiful
we are elegant
we are proud
we are learning
we are growing
we are walking in our power
The Fyne Prynt 
